My First Holiday With My Girlfriend's Family Was...Interesting

Maybe I'll Be Allowed Back...Maybe I'm Banned For Life!

November 26, 2018

Based on the cover photo for this blog, you're probably thinking "Wow, Gibbons! You've never looked this happy!" and you're absolutely correct! I LOOKED really happy in the pic...but I FELT REALLY NERVOUS!! Why, you ask? Well, because this pic was taken on Thanksgiving night at my girlfriend's friend's house and all I could think about was how I'd be meeting a bunch of my girlfriend's family for the FIRST TIME just two days later. Yes, my girlfriend's family celebrates Thanksgiving on Saturday. Why? Allow me to explain!

 

You know me, so you know I have a bit of a shady past (and PAST ONLY depending on who's asking), so you can imagine the anxiety I felt when I was told that my girlfriend's family does Thanksgiving dinner on Saturday because both her Uncle AND Cousin are Police Officers! AHHHH!!! And she told me this AS I WAS GETTING READY!! There would be no escaping this. I just had to hope they wouldn't immediately run my record and find out that I'm a total savage......and then it happened. Prepare for a foot-in-mouth moment in 3, 2, 1.......

 

My girlfriend's cousin (who, have I mentioned is a police officer?) turned to me after a few drinks and said something to me that I've heard countless times: "Since you work at a radio station, hook me up with some tickets to (insert concert here)!". What was I to do? Be honest with him and tell him that I don't have the proper pull required for free concert tickets or, ya know, have a little fun?! Come on, now! You know I decided to have a little fun! I quickly responded with: "Well, that depends...can you help me get rid of a few issues with your boys in blue?!" AND THEN the conversation quickly got serious.

 

When asked, I wouldn't say exactly what kind of issues I was referring to because, DUH, I wasn't about to rat myself out. So my girlfriend's uncle (who, by the way, is a SERGEANT) had my record pulled up by the time the N in "Nah I was just kidding" came out of my mouth. And this is where it gets REALLY interesting...

 

Guess what y'all! Your boy had ZERO outstanding warrants, ZERO unpaid tickets and ZERO worries! WOOOOOOO!!! Miracles DO exist! I seriously didn't know what they might find. The rest of the night went smooth as silk and the food was DELICIOUS.